It comes down to the fact that If I’m honest, I’m bored. Its tiring writing about pain and sadness; I want to write about fun or fluff, today at least. I worry that I’m not allowed, that it doesn’t fit the remit of writing as “the cancer suffers wife” Is there is a little room for frivolity?
I need to remind myself that writing with authenticity is the most important thing. If I want to write with humour for now, then I bloody well should. Cancer is pants, laughing in spite of it means pulling up my big girl britches and getting on with it. Just before I do, I feel the need to update the Mesothelioma journal.
Good news. Colin had a CT scan some weeks ago that has shown a reduction in disease. Good news. The hope is that the combination chemo/immunotherapy will not only reduce the disease, but the immunotherapy will maintain the reduction for longer. What we won’t know is for how long for. We are half way through the Chemo/Immuno regime now and although it is hard, particularly in the week after treatment. The knowledge that his body is busy socking it to those Mesothelioma cells makes it all the more bearable. It maintains the hope.
For a little light relief this week, I’m sharing my homework from my writer’s workshop. Asked to take a character from Mythology and reinvent them, in modern times as viewed through the eyes of another. I have taken Dionysus the Greek God of Wine, festivals and theatre. Dionysus was a much-loved God; he was the party guy, the one who taught King Midas the lesson about greed. In this re-imagining, Dion Ysus is a high school student, under the guidance of Principal Ms Hera. It’s very tongue in cheek, a little different and light relief from Cancer.
For gods’ sake, what has bloody Dion been up to now? Can that boy not just have a quiet weekend once in a while? I wish I had his energy quite honestly, but I thought we were safe with this one? Who else but bloody Dion Ysus could create carnage at a theatre excursion?
How many ended up in the hospital? Oh, Christ, I can see the headlines now “Mount Olympus high school student responsible for a community in crisis. Please tell me that those kids were using condoms for more than just goon bags? I suppose we can expect half the sodding school to be walking sideways and spending even longer in the bloody toilets now. The letters will come of course “Dear Ms Hera please excuse Ariadne and all her friends from school today due to appointments at the clap clinic.
Okay, okay, so, tell me again.. Dion seemed to summon, out of nowhere, enough of this so-called “wine” to get half the year ten girls blotto as well as the Satyr Boys and their cronies’?
Sounds like a right bloody party, except now I’m left to explain to a hundred parents and the Department why a “cultural experience” ended up needing eight ambulances, a riot van and ½ of the sodding Olympus police force to close down his impromptu “spring festival.”
Oh, which reminds me, the bus company Chariots as been on the phone, Formally refusing any further business we may want to put their way. Right, let us deal with this together, shall we? Pass me that diadem will you, I think I’m going to need it. Thank God Heph managed to stay out of this one.
Mr Ysus how are we feeling today? Head a little sore I hope? Are those leaves in your hair again Dion? How many times do we have to go through this? I’m all for freedom of expression and living life to the full. Just not in school, on school property, with school friends or while you remain a student here. Understood? AND Can we please agree that while in school you dress appropriately?
Look, Dion, I know that things are tough, what with your mother gone, I can’t help but take some responsibility for that, I suppose, but….. But your Dad, he’s an extraordinary man, and you can’t keep on embarrassing everyone like this! Your well liked Dion, your very popular, but try not to make a performance out of everything. I know you want more than just to settle down and have a couple of kids, but do you really think that all these theatrics are winning you any friends? There is help out there for you, and I don’t just mean medication for the ADHD, some impulse control may be helpful, though? There are counsellors and people that care about you maybe you could talk to them about your Mum and how much you wish you could be with her?”
A final note,
I suppose if I were really up myself, I could say, that comedy and tragedy are partners in crime. Our lives have all the ingredients of theatrical performance, comedy, drama, tragedy and an ending, where however much we have enjoyed being the players or audience. It is time to turn out the light and re-enter the world, no longer the same as we were before entering that particular theatre. Thankfully though I haven’t been at the wine yet, (tis only 3 pm after all). So instead I will just mix up my theatrical reference points and bid you adieu.